Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Rexburg is like a snowglobe. A blizzard in a bubble.

Letter addressed to the city of Rexburg, Weather Dept.

To whom it may concern:

This letter is in response to the unusual amount of precipitation and cold the city has been receiving this winter. As a citizen of Southeastern Idaho, I realize the value of moisture for agricultural purposes. However, many of Rexburg's citizens, myself included, have found that your efforts to avoid drought have been overzealous.

The dangers and negative consequences of your actions are becoming increasingly noticable with the approaching spring. Your raising of daily temperatures is much appreciated. However, because you have refused to do the same in the evenings, all of the snow that melts during the day simply freezes again at night, creating icy patches that present hazards that are both dangerous and occasionally embarrassing to negotiate.

The people of Rexburg also question your plans for snow removal as spring continues to approach. During the winter months, your enthusiasm for snow was clear and generally received without too much negativity. But now that the seasons are changing, members of the community are demanding plans regarding the removal of the gratuitously enormous mountains of snow you have deposited. Please consider that it is mid-March, and there are still piles of snow anywhere from 2 to 15 feet high.

While there have been less qualified candidates filling your position in past years, it would be in your best interest to repair the damage you have brought to the land and citizens of Rexburg if you are seeking re-election next term. It may even be profitable to seriously consider resigning early.

Sincerely,
Liz, Rexburg Citizen

snow

Things I Dream Of Lately:
10. Honduras
9. Swimming pools
8. Snow-cones
7. Sleeping outside
6. Running in the sprinklers
5. Otter-pops
4. Walking barefoot comfortably at 10 at night
3. Dresses, skirts, and shorts
2. Motorcycle rides
1. The green beneath the several feet of snow on the ground.

For the record, the city of Rexburg has actually declared a state of emergency this winter and spring. There's just too much snow. No one knows what to do with it.

1 comment:

Taylor Thompson said...

This post reminds me of one I did on my blog about a year ago. Except yours sounds prettier and more intelligent than mine. I believe mine said, "Dear Utah Weather, you suck. Love and kisses, Taylor." You are much more eloquent than I am.