Thursday, May 19, 2005

Call where yer at and we'll come where yer to!

Yargh! All right me hearties, I've got some bad news and I've got some good news. What say ye shall I tell first? The bad news, savvy? Yargh, tis a sorry tale indeed. Twas nigh 6:30 yesterday evenin at me job, whilst I was a-pullin a pallet-jack o' pet supplies out to the floor. I went to turn the blasted thing starboard, but blimey if she didn't turn. Her handle went right up and the thing didn't stop till she'd run right over me right heel. Hurt more than a barrel of gunpowder shoved up yer nose. I hobbled into the breakroom and took off me shoe, and twas blood and carnage nigh worse than I ever seen! I couldna walked on me foot if the devil himself crawled outta Davy Jones locker and called me down to watery hellish grave below a' I had ter run like mad ter hide meself. And wha's the good news, ye say? Well, savvy, went to the doctor and nothin's busted up too badly...no chips er tears er breaks er rips. Justa right bruised Achilles tendon and a chunk o' skin gone. But the thing to rejoice over tis it 'appened at work, so me decent employer paid for the doctor and supplies, and for the next 4 days I'll be takin off. I musta signed me John Hancock well nigh 50 times today. I've got meself some crutches fer the next few days and a little somethin to stabilize me foot whilst she's healin. The brace they've got me in looks like a bloody moon-boot. Tis enormous...all she be missing is jet-packs on the sides. A whole lot o' truck fer a little bruised tendon. But they say she's got to heal right so I'll be a-hobblin' around for a while. And that, me hearties, is how I got so that they're calling me "Peg-Leg Whittaker, the Scourge of the Seven Seas!"

A little note fer all those to whom it pertains: Me cell phone is at last a-workin' again. So ye can call me on it if ye wish. YARGH!

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yo-Ho, I am pleased! That your foot will be okay, that you got 4 days off of work, and that FINALLY your cell phone is working! Um, yargh.
-Long Jen Silver

No Bear Bartholimeaux said...

Elder Kevin John Ellis
Bulgaria Sofia Mission
Provo Missionary Training Center
2005 N 900 E
Provo UT 84604

I'd be hopin' yer parcel parrot'd fly true, truer 'n Ahab's harpoon, as it relays our communicae.

And may ye never face the same timult as 'at lubber, Achilles...Pegleg Whittaker is all sinyew...tough as bootstraps. ARR!

Kevin said...

BEARD...GOSH...its always wrong...no BEARD bartholimeaux!

Beckah said...

Um, arggh! I hope that ye ship is all fittin to boot and yer ready to set sail agin soon. And I'd be hopin to hear from ye soon, me ole matey!

Anonymous said...

I wish I had the Pirate-Talk talent. How do you guys all do that?!
-Jen

Derek said...

Word, you didn't link to my blog.. coopsscoop.blogspot.com

Elder Ellis said...

Missionary Training Center (May 25-Aug25, 2005):
Elder Kevin Ellis
Bulgaria Sofia Mission
Provo Missionary Training Center
2005 N 900 E
Provo UT 84604

Mission Home (Aug 25-May 2007):
Elder Kevin Ellis
Bulgaria Sofia Mission
Ul. Marin Drinov No. 21
1504 SofiaBulgaria

Once i'm in Bulgaria, my email will be 'elderellis@gmail.com'

Anonymous said...

wow, i'm completely spamming you with my addresses....maybe its a sign that you should write me.
-Kevin